Sunday, 21 December 2008

• how to win his heart???

  i have never really dated before. it hasn't been much of a priority, and i'm picky. most of the guys i meet make great friends, but i never really wanted to date them.

  then i met... well, i'll call him shawn. he's younger than me... by about a year. and he does have some growing to do, even i can see that. but we have a lot in common, he's an awesome guy. not perfect, but who is anyway? i know i'm not.

  i work with him, but i only see him about once a week. sometimes not even that often. this time of year, there's not much to do at my job.

  when he started working, i thought he'd make a great friend, just like all the other guys i work with. but it didn't take us long to figure out we had a lot in common... and we liked each other. so he asked me out... but because of various things, the date was set 9 days after he asked. in between, we both had too much time to think. he had broke up with another girl not too long before and was scared to get involved with anyone else, i am scared to get involved with anyone, period. we decided to go... just as friends. so we went to the movie, but it was awkward. we may have decided to go as friends, but we both were scared and we still liked each other. so we talked, but i know i wasn't exactly comfortable, nor was he. however, at the end of the night, he gave me a hug and said he's take me out again.

  for about a month after that we didn't see each other at work much, didn't really talk, texted every once in awhile. he told me at one point of time he wasn't totally over his ex and wasn't sure he wanted to keep anything going with me.

  until just the other day... at work. it was obvious that he still hadn't gotten over me. and i tried to hide it, but i felt the same way. i texted him the next day and asked him point blank. yeah, he liked me, but while we weren't talking he had gone out with another girl. and was still involved with her. i told him i liked him too... but i texted later and told him i wasn't willing to come between him and the other girl. after that, he texted one of my friends and told her that he didn't think it would work between us.

  i heard about this and texted him that i didn't really think it would work but i wanted to talk to him. i thought i did the right thing by telling him i wouldn't break up him and the other girl... but now i'm not sure. i'm really confused... i think he is too. friends tell me that they don't think he knows what he wants, he's a typical guy. one friend told me to tell him i'm over him and leave me alone. then maybe i can get over him. i'm not sure that i want to get over him. i don't know that anything would work but i want to give it a chance. another friend is encouraging me to be sexy, catch his eye, but be hard to get... i think i've been a little clingy, i want a serious relationship. i want to see if this could turn into one, but i'm not really sure how the whole dating thing works. believe me, i've learned a lot, but i've messed up a lot too. i'm not sure where things are at now, when i said i wanted to talk (in person), he said we would... when he had time. if he really wanted me, wouldn't he make time for me?

  i don't think he's really sure what he wants, but i don't really want to sit on the back burned until something happens with the other girl. i should probably try to get over with him, but i haven't met anyone i liked this much for a long time. i'm afraid to get my heart broken, but i'm willing to take a chance on this relationship. it's scary and new for me... can anyone help? i would especially like to hear the guys point of view.

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